A pastor's wife was expecting their first baby. At the next meeting of the congregation he asked for a raise. After much discussion they passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded, so would his paycheck. After six children this started to get expensive. The congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's expanding salary. A great deal of yelling and bickering ensued as to how much the clergyman's additional children were already costing the church, how much more it could potentially cost, and what to do about it. After listening to them for about an hour, the pastor rose from his chair and spoke, 'Children are a gift from god. We should take as many gifts as he gives us.' Silence fell on the congregation. In the back pew, a little old lady struggled to stand, and finally said in her frail voice, 'Rain is also a gift from god, b ut when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers.'
The first guy said, 'My son is my pride and joy. He got a good Catholic education and then started working at a successful company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied Economics and Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder and now he's the president of the company. He became so rich that he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes for his birthday.'
The second guy said, 'Darn, that's terrific! My son is my prideand joy. He also got a good Catholic education and he started working for a big airline, then went to flight school to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the company, where he owns the majority of its assets. He's so rich that he gave his best friend a brand new jet for his birthday.'
The third man said: 'Well, that's terrific! My son attended a good Catholic school, studied in the best universities and became an engineer. Then he started his own construction company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friend for hisbirthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion.'
The three friends congratulated each other
just as the fourth returned from the restroom and asked:
'What are all the congratulations for?'
One of the three said: 'We were talking about the pride we feel for the successes of our sons. ...What about your son?'
The fourth man replied: 'My son went to a state school, is gay and makes a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub.'
The three friends said: 'What a shame...
what a disappointment.'
The fourth man replied: 'No, I'm not ashamed. He's my son and I love him.
Btw,could you please tray and fix the font, etc...on the previous joke I posted? I tried 3 times and nothing happened.
-- Edited by iBeaux at 13:39, 2008-06-30
Both drinks had a deadly poison in the drinks' ice cubes. Sip sipped his and Gulp gulped his.
No one was able to figure it out when my co worker told it either.
As for the font issue, if you are copying text from a web page or an email that is colored or formatted a certain way, paste it into a simple text editor program using the txt only format. This will strip out the invisible html tags. Then re copy the plain txt here.
You know Artie, that joke almost still doesnt make sense. I mean, I figured out the meaning of their names had something to do with it, thats kind of a dead giveaway. However, considering the riddle doesnt specify whether Gulp crunched the ice cubes after he downed the drink. Also, you have to allow a margin there for the immediate ice melting upon the drink mixture hitting it as it enters the glass. Some amount of poison, no matter how minute, would've been ingested by Gulp. Then we have to take into consideration lesions in the esophageal lining, etc... It's still possible Gulp died first.
If it's not too much trouble, do you have a death certificate you could show me? LOL Ok, I'll stop thinking now...
Btw, thanks for the text help. I had no idea why the damn thing wouldn't format correctly. Wow, didnt know they hid things in my email text. Scary thought!
